dailies
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
-9:52 PM
today's training was.. weird?
it's raining, it's pouring...
the canoeists are paddling?lol. poor humour of mine :x
haha
it was raining real bad today. but my balance in the c1 improved significantly. 1/2 the capsize yesterday, and i managed to do a pathetic 22 laps in the bay. training felt rather short today due to the long meeting in the afternoon. haix. i fell asleep a number of times, but went uncaught. desmond was.. oh well.. by us, not by mr yong of course..
mr yong took c1 and did with us in the bay. he was seasoned. way way seasoned. i must be that level of pro-ness too. i must train hard. and push.
somehow, it's abit weird that the common image that the j1's wanna take after is sean's. cool huh?
haha
tomorrow.. it will be better!
everydropofblood,heartandsoul,heartandsoul,gothedistance
for perlis
for njc
for everything we do
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
-9:29 PM
math test. screwed. lost 8 marks so far. i think i'm gonna fail. i differentiated an integration question, and left a binomial question blank. ouch~
on another note, my foot has healed!
that is an absolutely good feeling. it felt a tad numb during my morning 2 round run, but by PE the next period, i could run and even sprint. even though, i still need to work on consistency. i tend to sprint, then die out later. we did catepillar runs, of which we screwed up all of them. we need to push the slower ones [of which we didn't - the guys just solo-ed the catepillar and made it a butterfly] so much for that. then later we struck a deal with the teacher, saying that if half the guys can run below 1:40 for one round, we're done with the catepillars. oh wells. her friend walked past and reduced it to 1:30. i was scared. if i fail, the whole class will run again.
and also, the fastest i hit was 1:35 for my first round in 2.4. this time, i ran. 300m sprint - 100m run [burnt out]. shi hao tossed me over the finishing line when i was about to cross it :x my timing was 1:19.
whew!
that was sad, since i burned out at the 300m mark. this shows my lack of training.
math lecture was b o r i n g. had to stand because i was late. lent aiman my notes, and he went to sleep -.- haha
gp was rather boring. me and shem fell asleep. then both cat highs were requested that we go to the loo to wash our faces. we're really tired!
3 free period - one to eat, one to do weights, one to play basketball with my frens. we were supposed to do econs project, but caslyn [spell correct not?] felt like playing bball. i also. so we persuaded the rest to follow. they were very eager. econs project? the most someone be absent and we say that the paper is with him/her lo.
such a capable and thinking person like me... [with me the whole world = GG]
went to play ball. jiaxuan not bad sia. i didn't know that she was a netballer back at her school. her accuracy is way way above mine lah! lucky she on my team :X my team.. IS PRO! haha! han xie ah.. i where got play challenge? my team like.. i'm the weakest link you know. haha! i must train more, and not disappoint in the next few games!
physics was a bore. my test got 13/18. it's pathetic. considering the fact that i lost marks due to carelessness. "i only gave you 1/3 for this qn. your answer is correct, but i do not understand your working" ..... i was so sad lah! wasted you know!
training was abit sluggish. especially the launching and pack-up. it's like sleepy hollow there at macr. oh wells. today is a bad day. especially when i cap 10-12 times, and finished only 30 laps in the bay. sob sob.
tomorrow. it's all or nothing.
as xavier said "balance first, then whack"
go C!
Monday, February 26, 2007
-9:41 PM
I AM TAKING A C1 TOMORROW!
- i feel the same way the T rowers feel when they hear that next training they're gonna move to a K craft. it's exhilarating!
so much for that. i shall push hard tomorrow. using a faster boat, i ought to go faster than my 35 laps covered in the bay today. i will train hard, and prove to the team that the C craft can win the K.
---
today is tiring.
i woke up with a stabbing pain in my foot. looks like no morning running for me. did simple exercises instead. that's rather sad, since i prefer running to doing simples...
my arm strength ain't that good...i shall train to make it sean-size. rahhs...
wobbled around like a duck around school. it was so un-glam lah! i got into trouble for talking in the chem lecture hall. well, i managed to get away scot-free this time, as my chem tutor could not recognise me from far :X
training was delayed due to a thunderstorm. it wasn't good. my head began to feel the strain. and it felt pain. PAIN! nevertheless, i went for training. i wanted to press on. finished 35 laps, capsized twice. TWICE IS PATHETIC ENOUGH. once, due to my paddle getting sucked in due to an improper stroke. the second one was towards the end of training, when i just could not hold the pain in my head and just gave in to the throbbing pain. I AM WEAK, MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY.
[finished 35laps instead of my intended 50. disappointment. it will improve next training]
oh wells. today. i must give time to let the wound on my foot heal. then after, i shall revive. and press on. the C has been downplayed for a long time already. literally DOWNPLAYED! the timings have been so discriminative towards the C rowers in general. I feel that we will make a difference, and push the C to be on par, if not better than the K.
PRESS ON!
TO THE FINISH LINE!
HEARTANDSOUL,HEARTANDSOUL,GOTHEDISTANCE!
---
math test tomorrow - make it a double! [canoe math test and tutorial test]
shall go study now.
and finish the 60 pushups that c-rowers owe.
byebye
Saturday, February 24, 2007
-1:30 PM
FINALLY GOT TO USE A C-1! xD
because zy was late and i used his craft [orders from above]
however, training was sad.. or should i say, pathetic.
the c craft is way way sexier than i thought. it was sleek, and cuts through the water. the balancing part is rather easy for a first timer like me. it was lighter at the center, so for me, i can easily shift my weight to balance the craft. compared to a t, which is heavier, and when the t leans, it's almost GG for me already. i love the c craft! haha
but still... the K is better...the seniors thought that i was not pushing hard enough. i was a c-first-timer trying to get the hang of the boat, definitely i will take a longer time to get on it compared to the other more seasoned rowers, then how am i expected to launch at the same speed as them?
furthermore, i finished one lap when bg and the rest just launched. when turning my craft around when the rest began their first lap, they thought i was slacking in the bay. -.-
this ain't easy you know. the c-1 is supposedly a more unstable boat. the word supposedly was used because i find that i capsize more in a t-1 craft doing c-style then in a c-1 craft. weird huh? i guess enough sleep will really boost one's focus greatly..
sleep.. something which i have been deprived of for so long...
the morning run before training was rather screwed. apparently the cut on my leg has not healed, and my sock had a spot of blood when i put it on after training..
every drop of blood, heart and soul, heart and soul go the distance!literally "every drop of blood"..
100 pushups because c-rowers are believed to be more slacky, 100 because supersenior V compained, 200 because of my "poor attitude".
so much for "poor attitude".
not as if i never push liddat...
but haiz. i shall push more!
C-style for the win!
---
a little humour
some other school guys were helping a capsized t-1 at the bay..
"thank you thank you"
"no problem, come lets drain his boat together"
"okay, we anchor craft to make it more stable"
-begin emptying the craft-
"HELP WATER ENTERING MY COCKPIT!"
"CAREFUL CAREFUL"
-rows for a while then capsize-
lolx. haha...
lucky i did not capsize when laughing :X
Friday, February 23, 2007
-8:47 PM
haven't updated for a very long time :X
cca has been rather fun and enriching, especially when i learnt to control the T-1 c style better after each training. unfortunately i am not up to mark as before because i had been stuffing myself this cny. haix. today was rather unfortunate. capsized and my right feet landed onto the rocks~ ouch! then when yong called for packup, i did not packup immediately. [c rowers pack up at a later timing from the rest] and because of that, the whole team gets punished. i am feeling rather guilty. :S
school's been rather fun as well. with me sleeping in lessons and all. yesterday and today, i was completely off-form during school and training due to the lack of sleep. homework is slowly increasing and closing down on me. but still, i am managing fine. just hope that i do not look too old for a 17. i have to be consistent in schoolwork, as for canoeists, we have tests and all randomly, to check on our studies. so far so good, passing everything. but still, i do not want a mere pass. i want something more... hehe
oh wells
busy busy busy. i will be full for the whole of march hols. haha. cool huh?
--
when i looked back at the time when before i joined canoeing, and after the time when i joined canoeing, i found much difference in my lifestyle. i feel that i have become more disciplined and more focused in life. i spend my time more productively, and more meaningfully. i used to play dota till late after school, but now, i spend it training up. then the renmants are for doing homework and mugging ahead of lessons. it has definitely changed me alot, and i feel that it is good.
--
i do not quite agree with mr yong's saying that "good leaders are never nice guys". i believe in motivating the people through respect, rather than intimidation through shouting and reprimandation. oh wells. this is just my ranting.. randomness
--
thanks to jx for bringing sweets to keep me awake during econs :)
haha
--
shall have dinner now. nights.
Friday, February 16, 2007
-11:53 PM
friday.
woke up early. told myself 5 more minutes. it dragged on till late. reached school, ran one round with shi wei and calvin [200 hard 200 easy - no relations to water training hor!] then joined the team for ball games. it's a modified version of handball [no dribbling, no bouncing, no jumping]. imho, BLEH!
--
cny celebrations are b o r i n g. i wanted to sleep. but then again, if i sleep now, i probably wouldn't wake up! oh wells. i was smsing the cat high ppl if they want to return to cat high, of which, many declined. they got OG outings. humph!
--
went back and visited teachers. they looked a little surprised to see me there. and some other old boys. haha. cool huh? i'm very
yin shui shi yuan one lo. haha!
IT club has undergone some major changes. i'm rather impressed by how it has changed :
- there's divisions in each department taking care of different tasks [more structured :) ]
- jie chou would be president if he succeeds in this camp planning [oooh~]
- IT club camp to be in fri/sat of march hols [i'll drop in after OIC if possible. stayover? :P ]
- IT club finally got it's own jacket [waah!]
- the juniors have been training hard for competitions! [yeahh~]
--
the j1s supposed to have a outing today, but somehow no one contacted me, so i ended up playing computer and sleeping at home. haha. i'm like so slacky lah! time to reply testimonials already!
--
-11:40 PM
07s20 <3
-11:35 PM
MUGGING @ NJ IN PROGRESS.. SSSHH!
Thursday, February 15, 2007
-9:20 PM
morning training - self train.
i ran 3 rounds - ran the first, 1/2 ran 1/2 jogged the second, jogged the last round. 20 crunches, then held in position with calvin.
looking at the others train make me really want to train as well.
anyway, i passed that chem test. so it's back to training for me! but somehow when i look through the paper, i felt utterly disappointed with myself. my failure to read instructions/check my work cost me a small sum of marks. anything more, and it's off to the library for extended study session for me :(
"go to jail
go directly to jail
do not pass go
do not collect 200"
-monopoly
--
pe was rather interesting. free games. i played bball. somehow my skills are lagging. however, i could still push through the defenses. but somehow i cannot shoot accurately. haix. my first assault on the defence resulted in a fall. ouch~
--
lessons was rather interesting. fatigue took over, and i slept during chemistry lecture. somehow i ended up on ben hong's shoulder. :X
hengyang/joseph called me. then i was still asleep. i was so tired. sorry man.
--
trained weights during recess. my back was beginning to hurt. my thighs also. injury sustained this morning not that bad for now...
did not take any food so far since breakfast. i lost my appetite. sorry to those who worry for me
--
went for math lesson. lecture test results not out yet. patience is a virtue. oh wells. i dun wanna see it also. it'll be terrible...
--
moving on, it was time for training. i was feeling weak after all that activity today. when i heard that i was going to row a t2, i literally saw stars. gerald, i'm sorry for not doing much today.
finished 7km, fell off 1 time.
accomplished?
i feel that this is shit. i have done nothing but shit.
--
self motivation is the best motivation i guess. somehow i feel that i have no pull on water. i cannot feel my own glide..
--
munched on a bread after training. my first 'meal' of the day. i wasn't feeling very hungry either.
--
tired.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
-9:12 PM
valentine's day shall speak for itself.. look at the pics uploaded [SOON].. but it seemed more like
christmas to me. oh wells. guess i'm not used to celebrating v day due to my 4 years existence in a guy's school. today.. the only thing i can dedicate to.. is my paddle. wonderful? imagine holding a paddle in the 'proposing stance', and ROW! cool ain't it?
ordered shoes from su lin. thanks for allowing me to make last minute changes :X
Today's training was relatively better compared to yesterday. I completed 50 sets in the bay. Which is something i have never done before. I guess it must be the new resolution to push myself more in training and achieve more out of me [a fat piece of shit].
i have to focus more on consistency, focus and direction. i was relatively fast for my first 20 sets, then died out thereafter. then chee wee lapped me. i was like.. oh mans! then i tried powering up, and that lasted me for my next 20 sets. the last 10 sets was to hit my personal target of 50 in the bay. yay me!
but sadly though, i slacked for my 46-49th set. picked up speed in the last set and got ready to pack up.
tomorrow is another day for training. i want to push myself further. i felt that i have not pushed myself enough during training. somehow i feel that i have the strength to run about. haix.
*see's Cara's paddle closing in on my head and tries to duck*
no lahh, she ain't that bad to smack me :p
and oh, she's running at 0715. i got study session.. haix.. haha. next time then!
---
i would like to thank God for his sustainence through this time. i am not a physical person, but He has been with me all the way...
"Faithful father"
Father I can't explain this kind of love, this kind of grace
I know, I still break your heart and yet you run to welcome me
(chorus)
This is my song of praise to you
For who you are and all that you do
from the moment my life began, you have been faithful
Father, I love the way you hold me close and say my name
I know, when my life is through my heart will find it's home in you
(chorus)
This is my song of praise to you for who you are and all that you do
From the moment the world began
You have been faithful
(Repeat chorus)
You have been faithful, forever faithful...father
---
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
-11:02 PM
today i had a rather screwed up training
mr yong wanted a sudden change of plans... some of the seniors have to do their timed trials today. then victor left in the c1 i was supposed to do. then i had to run barefooted back to the t shed to carry out one t2. then later the trainer took that t2, and i had to find a t1 that was convieniently lying on the shore. then no one was in the bay. so i hoisted the t1 onto my shoulder and carried it into the water. i was staggering. guess i need to train my strength up more. then later i rode around in the bay. i felt that i have wasted alot of training time running about trying to get a craft... but anyway, i used xavier's paddle and i went relatively faster today. and i tried out the J stroke. it was ohmygawd pro lah. if not properly done [for n00bs like me] , the force will turn your boat around. for me, i did a semicircle -.-
but now i know how to handle and use the j stroke already [it's improper mind you]. pushup today was a high at 200 counts. haix. reduced to doing it girl's style. and was not doing proper form. such a disgrace to the men. my arms are like tofu weak. humph.
i felt super down after training. i felt disappointment. when i looked in the mirror, i saw nothing but n00b-ness staring back at me. 'n00b' should be written on my forehead. i left early, without waiting for the guys. somehow i do not feel up to task. i feel like a loser.
then i was at the bus stop, missing my bus. which made me feel worse. then hengyang and maxy and del [spelt correctly?] were there much later. they tried to make me feel better. thanks to cara also for encouraging me and offering me her drink also.
thanks to all who encouraged me :)
ppl to thank for encouraging me : cara, maxy, del, hengyang/joseph , qinrui
i am weak. but very soon, i will rise.
Saturday, February 10, 2007
-4:29 PM
thanks to all those who wished me luck [the list of people seem endless...]
anyway, training today was rather slack for me. i can't seem to concentrate. so much for the 'high' yesterday. haha. i capped like nuts at the beginning. then i picked up later. the sun was warm man! i don't want to get darker! i am dark enough already! haha. hmm.. i did not bother to empty the water in my boat. [it was just a small amount] i used that to control my stability. if my body's weight about, the water will magnify that shift and i will capsize. using that, i will be more in control and focus then if my boat were to be empty and i keep rocking about like nobody's business. oh wells..
i have little homework left to do. haha. so much for the slacker me. is it just me, or that i did not record down any homework?
left to j8 for lunch. met meixin there. she was super gullible [or should i say blur?]. we told her that our L1R5 are like 20+ and she was like.. huhhh.. that means you all cannot come back lah. then we all gave her a sad face. she looked really sad also lah! then she said. i thot shu jun said that you got 7?
i was rather stunned. but then again. i went on.. "i bluff her mah... "
AND MEIXIN BELIEVED!
then she stood there blankly...
until we "enlightenend her"...
and she didn't look very impressed...
---
tagged along with aiman as he followed meixin and nat around shopping while waiting for the guys to finish up their food. the pair were amazing! they like can self-amuse themselves in a clothes shop... maybe it's just that i know little about women shopping to comprehend...
---
returned to cat high to collect cans. sadly, the rubbish was just cleared. then i found a whole stash in the female teachers' toilet. then again, ed and i suspected that the cleaner wanted it for herself.. [it's all neatly stacked up] and just left it there...
---
do i look fat?---
ANNOUNCEMENT : JIA XUAN AND I WILL BE JOGGING THIS FRIDAY. ANYONE INTERESTED IN JOINING US? IF THERE'S ENOUGH PEOPLE, WE'LL BE PLAYING CAPTAIN'S BALL [IF WE CAN FIND A BALL...]
Friday, February 09, 2007
-5:25 PM
i got a little more than what i expected
ms tan was smiling when she passed me my result slip
i guess i was looking terrible when i sat there in front of her, awaiting my slip
oh well
my results are great!
G-r-e-a-t!
thanks be to God!
---
convo with Xavier
me : i got 7
x : okay
[ends call]
[x calls]
x : before bonus? as in raw?
me : ya
[ends call]
[x calls again]
x : who's this ah?
me : clayton
-.-
---
Thursday, February 08, 2007
-8:33 PM
i shall post all the pics of the days i have in nj soon when i can find my phone cable...
10 of the memorable statements i have heard in my time in nj
- "you know.. that chem teacher got 7 moles" - simin
- "if you say gullible real slowly, it sounds like banana.." - meiqi
- "ppl say that we join canoeing is to jio girls..." - edmund
- "let's go train!'' - shi wei
- "win by effort, lose by luck" - mr yong
- "blade 45 deg. more power, more force... PULL!" - victor
- "train harder! you want to be stronger right?" - huiming
- "that boy in the 3rd row... can someone wake him up?" - econs lecturer
- "7 more days to v day. how?" - shi hao
- "wake me up when the period ends" - me
-6:53 PM
blog updates
#linked cara and maxine
- i didn't know that maxy is a christian! another child of God in the house! xD
# and dexter's praying? that's a nice one on his way back to christianity!
---
I have been so busy these days, that I had not have time to update my blog! oh wells, so much for schoolwork...
yesterday was definitely a memorable day. it was a turning point for my depressions in C. i met tze tian and chen xiao. they were stunned to see my doing C-style in a T1 boat. their impressed look gave me that confidence and that boost that i need to press on during training. man, that feeling was good! after hearing from chen xiao that he capped while doing normal style, i can't help but be awed by how much i have improved in my time at NJ [i have been in the team since the start of Jan 07 only!] I was beginning to enjoy my C-style. it felt good to be able to show off for a while, until i capped.
-.-
joke-of-the-day : claytoncmk
anyway, i reached home all tired. i didn't study for the darn canoeing physics test. i slept like a pig till morning, and i rushed to school because i overslept. anyway, the test was super n00b-ish. got 8/10 without revising. guess i'm just lucky this time round ain't i?
to be in nj canoeing is a blessing and a previlege.
---
tomorrow's the release of the O's results. I'm very very tensed up and stressed up as well. in short, trussed up like a christmas turkey.
i want to return to nj. and i need 8 points to be sure. 9 points will only put me into a 50-50 situation of returning to nj. and probablity ain't exactly in my dictionary.
it's either double or nothing.
oh wells. i told my parents.. if you all don't see me, check tomorrow's papers.
somehow, certain people mistake me for being on the FRONT cover. well, it's not. it's one of the pages where condolences are offered...
into the misty grey unknown i slip...
---
so much for these demoralising thoughts.
lets just hope that i return to nj lo
that's whay everyone says
but is it reliable?
will i have the strength to open the paper tomorrow?
will i have the courage to see my failure?
will i be able to press on?
lastly, will i remain in nj?
oh wells
claytoncmk
stop thinking
ms tan said that it would be fine
then it should be fine
why worry?
not as if it will change anything
but still
i am worrying
if i cannot come to nj
or should i say, return...
then well
i will miss all of you guys..
but what can i do?
but resign to my fate
and fall back into darkness that is waiting to engulf me
will tomorrow
be sunshine or rainfall
that i don't know
i can't predict the future
nor can i change the future
so i shall leave
it all to the Father Almighty
and commit myself into His hands.
Father, protect me,
for I am weak
mentally and physically
strengthen me
allow me to face up to myself
when i receive my results tomorrow
whether it's good or bad
i want to lift it all up to you
for you are God
the Father Almighty
the Love everlasting
and the Alpha and the Omega.
Monday, February 05, 2007
-10:54 PM
-10:27 PM
1 tuna sandwich
1 hotdog
1 bubble tea
2 slices of cheese
2 pieces of plain bread
no, that ain't my breakfast, neither is it my lunch. it's what i toko from morning to 8.30pm. cool huh? i just realised that i ate so much! now i'm waiting for dinner. looking at this, it seems as if i am fattening up for thanksgiving! [turkey?]
training is getting harder and tougher. the seniors are instructed to come down hard on the juniors to prevent our team from wasting training time. oh wells, lets just say that i had a hard time. not my day though. between the thumb and the index finger, there was a blister which appeared. and to think that it burst in the same training itself! my last finger wasn't spared either! ouch man~
so much for that. i seem like a wimp complaining here about my shortcomings. maybe i am not fit enough, maybe it's a fact that i'm weak and unable to take up so much physical activity.
i may not have all those strengths possessed by athletes, but i have a heart. and that is what counts. i want to use my heart to train to improve my skills, not only in canoeing , but also in studies. i want to fight and press on... to emerge stronger than yesterday. the C style needs more getting used to. the stupid footrest caused my leg to feel abrasion. humph.
anyway, results are out this friday 2.30pm. hmm.....
Thursday, February 01, 2007
-10:11 PM
slept during lectures and tutorials today. surprisingly, i was rather tired, though i had an earl night last night. anyways, training was rather sad. i was in C-style [the most dreaded style]. the senior behind me [ivan] was rather kind and all. he was rather patient when i capped the T2. [the T2 is supposed to be the un-cappable craft]. oh wells. my legs are too long to do c-style in a T2, so my feet are caught underneath ivan's footrest [he's seated behind]. so when i cap, my knee pivot over the combing, and i caped the whole craft. that was really bad, coz my knee's hurting like crazy. ivan's rather patient. he's rather nice too. heard from some of the more senior members that ivan can't stand being in the water. oh wells. guess it's my luck. anyway, he says that i'm improving! yay me!
i wanna thank all the nice nice seniors who were patient with me, given my pathetic physical endurances and all. thanks to sijing, sabu, ivan, jared, franklin, hui ming.. and so on...
i shall train hard and not disappoint any of the seniors there! results out next week, and i do wish to remain in nj.
the c-style is really terrible. imagine a guy kneeling down , proposing to his girlfriend. instead of flowers on the right hand, it's a dragon-boat kind of paddle. and in that position, maintain training for 1-2 hours. it's said that marathon people have to endure that for 3 plus hours. ouch~
my arms ain't fantastic [though they can last me for 10-12 km]. my legs aren't [they burn out faster than wood]. and i wanna make sure that i'm all toned up and ready for training! ivan says that i'm better for the c-style coz i'm taller and can reach out further, given my longer arms. even so, my bulk and my height makes me unstable in strong wave conditions and strong wind.
i don't wanna do c!! [do i look like i have a choice?] anyway, edmund and i have a pact. that is , if we remain in nj canoeing, we're going to be the legends of our batch. so much for that great thought. i'm gonna work towards it! one day, people shall eat our backwash...
